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Zooey Deschanel is the ultimate cool mom. She stars in some of our favorite films (Elf! 500 Days of Summer! Harold and the Purple Crayon!), sings with her band She & Him, and wears bold and innovative fashions at red-carpet events, all while doing normal mom stuff, too. And even though she is effortlessly chic, Deschanel is also extremely relatable. SheKnows caught up with the multi-talented mom of two to chat about Christmas, motherhood, and her latest holiday collaboration with Vera Bradley, and she shared some words of wisdom that will stick with us throughout the holiday season.
A few minutes after meeting the bubbly and beautiful actress over Zoom, Deschanel said something that spoke directly to one of my biggest insecurities. Was there something in my eyes — some exhausted-mom-bat-signal — that she could sense? Or is it just that inherent understanding that all mothers go through similar feelings of inadequacy and exhaustion that prompted her to say it? Either way, I felt instantly better once she did. Her words echoed like a perfect mantra, ready to be pulled out whenever moms (like me) need an extra confident boost or assurance that they are going to fine.
The New Girl alum’s simple and powerful truth? “You’re a mom, but you’re not dead, you know?” she tells me. Yes, girl!
“That’s my life motto,” I jokingly respond, but the words reverberate through my head just the same. Why do I sometimes act like I can’t enjoy fashion or friends or pursuing my passions just because I’m a mom of three? After all, Deschanel doesn’t let parenting her kids Elsie Otter, 9, and Charlie Wolf, 7, who she shares with ex-husband Jacob Pechenik, stop her from working and living her life. (Or renovating her “forever home” with Property Brothers co-host and her fiancé Jonathan Scott.) She’s the perfect example of someone who loves her kids wholeheartedly, but hasn’t lost sight of herself. And if she could bottle up some of that mom confidence and share it with the class, that would be great!
Deschanel’s full-speed-ahead attitude toward the embracing the beauty in life extends to the holiday season. “I love decorating for Christmas,” Deschanel tells me with a smile. For her, the holidays mean singing Christmas carols, baking cookies, and spending time with loved ones, including her kids. “I love most of all, being with family,” she gushes.
For a woman who famously played grouchy department store worker Jovie in Elf — which, BTW, she does not watch every year with her kids because that would be “kind of, like, narcissistic” — it’s nice to hear that she does have a healthy supply of holiday cheer. Despite not watching the cult classic holiday film starring Will Ferrell, Deschanel does embody one of the messages of the movie: “The best way to spread holiday cheer is singing loud for all to hear.”
“I’ve always loved singing Christmas carols,” she says, adding that her kids sing with her but they get shy. “My daughter really likes to sing,” Deschanel continues. “She gets a little bit timid about it, but she has a has a very pretty voice. They both love music, though,” she says about her kids. (They also seem to love the holidays, as they each have their own Christmas trees that they can decorate with homemade ornaments in their playroom!)
Another way Deschanel embraces this wonderful time of year is by partnering with Vera Bradley to promote their new holiday collection. “I’ve been a fan [of Vera Bradley] for a long time, but they have recently expanded their offerings and now have, like, a lot of really beautiful … more high-end aesthetic,” she says.
Their new collection is beautiful and functional, making it perfect for moms. “If you’re a mom, you like organization, right? So something like this cute,” she says, holding up Vera Bradley’s Original Tote in Bossanova Bold Nylon Twill, which is super colorful and has tons of room for all the items moms need. Another bag Deschanel recommends is the Marcelle Shoulder Bag in Goji Beri Red Nylon Twill, which reminds her of the “cool, Y2K aesthetic, which is very on trend.”
“I like a bigger evening bag, or even this, this is very big,” Deschanel continues, demonstrating the Taper Dumpling Bag in Purple Metallic Leather. “That’s pretty neat, your evening bag can fit a coloring book or two in there.”
“The holiday collection is just so fun. And there’s so many different colors and patterns and, you know, textures,” she adds, showing another one of her favorites in velvet, the Astoria Shoulder Bag in Sea Moss Velvet. Deschanel continues, “There’s this really cute bear. My daughter might try to steal this from me,” she adds with a laugh, referring to the gummy bear-shaped Heritage Bear Crossbody in Goji Berry Red Leather. We don’t blame her at all!
Having a cute bag for your upcoming holiday travel or parties — or finding the perfect gift for everyone on your list — can help take some of the stress out of the holiday season. It’s just one less thing to worry about!
At this point in the interview, we pivot back to talking about our kids. I ask Deschanel what surprised her the most about being a mom, and like everything else she’s said, Deschanel kept things real. According to her, motherhood is “very all-encompassing.” She explains, “It’s like, when I said before, ‘you’re a mom, you’re not dead,’ but like, sometimes you feel dead, you know? The end of the day is — sometimes I’ll have makeup all over my face. Like, mascara’s traveling down my face and my skin looks gray. I’m like, ‘what happened to me?’” This is so, so true! Whether you’re famous or not, we’re all just exhausted moms with spit-up on our shirts, bags under our eyes, and hair so messy even rats wouldn’t make their nests in it. We love it, of course, but sometimes it’s nice to be reminded we are people, too.
“You go from being a person that cares about your presentation…” she continues, trailing off before backtracking a little bit. “I still care. But it’s like you get so focused on your kids that you kind of forget about everything,” she clarifies, adding that she makes self-care a priority. Because how can a mom even focus when she hasn’t taken care of herself first?
Still, Deschanel reassures me that her kids are definitely her “number one, most important thing.” “So of course, when I’m with them, yeah, what I’m thinking about most,” she says. “I’m not worried about making time for the kids, because they get all the time. They end up being first priority for me, always.”
As we get ready for the holidays, Deschanel can’t help but reflect on the low-key way her blended family spent last Christmas. Their plans got canceled and they ended up staying home, which Deschanel says “was actually so nice because we just sat, we watched musicals, and it was really fun, and it was cozy.” She adds, “And I try to just not make too many plans and have time to just relax and enjoy, you know, the company of [my] family. That time is really special.”
What a beautiful way to keep things in perspective. Prioritize your kids, but make time for feeling like yourself, too. Sounds like the perfect New Year’s resolution!
Shop some of Deschanel’s favorite Vera Bradley holiday bags below, and check out the full collection HERE.
Original Tote in Bossanova Bold Nylon Twill
This water-repellant tote has a zipper pocket and internal pouches to help you stay organized.
Marcelle Shoulder Bag in Goji Beri Red Nylon Twill.
Surprisingly roomy with an adjustable strap, this cool purse is “very classic” and “chic,” according to Deschanel.
Taper Dumpling Bag in Purple Metallic Leather
Go “out on the town” with this metallic purple evening bag that can be worn as a crossbody or a clutch.
Astoria Shoulder Bag in Sea Moss Velvet
This gorgeous green velvet purse will be your holiday party go-to, as it’s chic and roomy at the same time.
Heritage Bear Crossbody in Goji Berry Red Leather
How cute is this little bear crossbody? It’s a “conversation starter” that is “roomier than you think,” says Deschanel, and will fit your phone and other essentials.
Before you go, check out these celebrity kids who are fashion icons in the making.
